Ill Communication

1994, Grand Royal Records/Capitol Records
Produced by Beastie Boys and Mario Caldato, Jr.
Annotations: soopageek

Sure Shot
Tough Guy
B-Boys Makin' With the Freak Freak
Bobo On the Corner
Root Down
Sabotage
Get It Together
Sabrosa
The Update
Futterman's Rule
Alright Hear This
Eugene's Lament
Flute Loop
Do It
Ricky's Theme
Heart Attack Man
The Scoop
Shambala
Bodhisattva Vow
Transitions


Sure Shot (Beastie Boys/DJ Hurricane/Caldato)
         Primary sample:  "Howlin' For Judy" - Jeremy Steig

*(dog barking)*

'Cause you can't, you won't and you don't stop
Mike D come and rock the sure shot

I've got the brand new doo-doo guaranteed like Yoo Hoo
    A popular, chocolate flavored soft drink.
I'm on like Dr John, yeah, Mr Zu Zu
    "Zu Zu Man" - Dr. John (1975).
I'm a newlywed, I'm not a divorcee
And everything I do is funky like Lee Dorsey
    "Everything I Do Is Gonh Be Funky" - Allen Toussaint, recorded by Lee Dorsey.
Well, it's The Taking of Pelham, 1, 2, 3
    "The Taking of Pelham, 1,2,3".  Film starring Robert Shaw, Hector Elizondo, and Walter Matthau (1974).
If you want a doodoo rhyme then come see me
I got the savoir faire with the unique rhyme and
I keep it on and on, it's never quitting time and
Strictly hand held is the style I go
Never rock the mic with the panty hose
         For the first 5 years of this webpage's existence, I had no annotation here since, to me, it seems fairly obvious.  But since I get a lot of email concerning it, I'll put here my standard email response:  watch the video!  If you still have questions then email me.
I strap on my ear goggles and I'm ready to go
'Cause at the boards is the man they call the Mario
    Mario Caldato, Jr. produced Ill Communication.
Pull up at the function and you know I Kojak
    Kojak was a TV detective show starring Telly Savalas in the 1970's.
To all the party people that are on my bozak
I've got more action than my man John Woo
    John Woo is the famed Hong Kong action film director.
And I've got mad hits like I was Rod Carew
         Baseball hall of famer who played for the Minnesota Twins and the California Angels, known for his exceptional hitting ability.

'Cause you can't, you won't and you don't stop
Ad Rock come and rock the sure shot

Hurricane will cross fade on your ass and bust your ear drums
Listen everybody 'couse I'm shifting gears I'm
Fresh like Doug E when I set my specs and
    Doug E. Fresh is an east coat rapper with old school flavor, big back in the day, circa 1986.
On the microphone I come correct
Timing like a clock when I rock the hip hop
Top notch is my stock on the soap box
I've got more rhymes than I've got grey hairs
And that's alot because I've got my share
I've got a hole in my head and there's no one to fix it
Got to straighten my thoughts, I'm thinking too much sick shit
Everyone just takes and takes, takes, takes, takes
I've got to step back, I've got to contemplate
Well I'm like Lee Perry, I'm very on
    Lee "Scratch" Perry, the legendary reggae producer/musician.
Rock the microphone and then I'm gone
I'm like Vaughn Bode, I'm a Cheech Wizard
    Cheech Wizard was an underground comic strip created by Vaughn Bode in the 1970's.
Never quitting, so won't you listen

*oh yes indeed, it's fun time*
    sample: Moms Mabley from the LP The Funny Side of Moms Mabley.

'Cause you can't, you won't and you don't stop
MCA come and rock the sure shot

I want to say a little something that's long overdue
The disrespect to women has got to be through
To all the mothers and sisters and the wives and friends
I want to offer my love and respect to the end
Well you say I'm twentysomething and should be slacking
    Referring to people in broad demographic age groups utilizing the phrase "something" became vogue after the ABC drama thirtysomething aired during the 1980's.
But I'm working harder than ever and you could call it macking
So I'm supposed to sit upon my couch watching my TV
I'm still listening to wax, I'm not using the CD
Well I'm that kid in the corner
All fucked up and I wanna so I'm gonna
Take a piece of the pie, why not, I'm not quitting
Think I'ma change up my style just to fit in
I keep my underwear up with a piece of elastic
I use a bullshit mic that's made out of plastic
To send my rhymes out to all of the nations
Like Ma Bell, I've got the ill communications
    "Ma Bell" was a popular nickname for the Bell telephone company.

'Cause you can't and you won't and you don't stop
Throwing and rocking the sure shot
*B boys B girls*
 

Tough Guy (Beastie Boys/Smith)

Butcher me on the court
Too many elbows to report
And now you're poking me in the eye
Bill Laimbeer motherfucker, it's time for you to die
         Bill Laimbeer played for the Detroit Pistons from 1982-1994, with a reputation for being a "bad boy" and playing "combat basketball".

Tough guy, it's time to check yourself
Dribbling the ball like the Biz can be bad for your health
Tough guy, what you got to prove
Moving like an elephant, that's your favorite move
Tough guy, your shit is going out

Box me out with your fat ass
Throw me around like a bounce pass
You've got a tombstone hanging over your dick
You cause a minor earthquake when you throw a moving pick

Tough guy, you think you're like the Shaq
    Professional baskteball player Shaquille O'neil.
Keep running around, you'll catch a heart attack
Tough guy, what are you giving me
The way you're playing ball, you'll stop me from living B

Tough guy, tough guy
Tough guy, you're shit is weak
Tough guy, you fucking freak
Tough guy, I'll stick I'll stick your shit
Tough guy

B-boys Makin´ With the Freak Freak (Beastie Boys)

*softly*
*awww yeah*

*B-boys makin' with the freak freak*
    sample: "Beat Bop" - Rammellzee and K-Rob (1983)

Yeah yeah
Putting songs together ain't no puzzle like Yahtzee
    Well, Yahtzee ain't no puzzle, but it made for a nice rhyme. Yahtzee is a dice game made by Hasbro.
Sending this out to K-Rob and Rammellzee
    Rammellzee and K-Rob released "Beat Bop" in 1983 as a "test pressing" limited to 500 copies with original art work by Jean-Michel Basquiat.  It was originally meant to be a battle record between Basquiat and Rammellzee, and Basquiat paid for the production of the recording.  Rammellzee and K-Rob, felt that Basquiat's rhymes were ridiculous and used the paid-for studio time to create this song.
Let me introduce myself on this cut
I'm Ad Rock, I'm lit like a motherfuck
Well, I'm brewing up rhymes like I was using a still
Kicking an old school flow like Mike McGill
    Mike McGill was an old-school skater for Bones Brigade. Thanks to Jamin Claus for this informational tidbit.
'Cause Yauch's on the upright, the shit just ain't funny
Got fat bass lines like Russell Simmons steals money
    Russell Simmons is one of the co-founders of the def jam record label.  The Beastie Boys reportedly left the label after the success of their first album over royalty squabbles with management at the label.
I got clientele, you know I rock well
And then you're on my dick because I'm DFL
    Dead Fucking Last.  DFL was a punk-rock band on the Grand Royal label.  Also refers to the enviable position on a concert bill, because if you're headlining, you go on DFL
Yeah, Mike 'cause playing the bass is my favorite shit
I might be a hack on the stand up but I'm working at it
I got my hair cut correct like Anthony Mason
         At the time of these lyrics, Anthony Mason played for the New York Knicks.
Then I ride the I.R.T. right up to Penn Station
Penn Station up on 8th Ave.
         Interboro Rapid Transit started the New York subway system in 1904.  Penn Station, however, is on the old Independent Subway System line.  Today, all subways are controlled by the MTA (Metropolitan Transport Authority).
Listen all y'all you get the ball bath
He's got the savoir faire because he's debonair
Mike D with the vinyl and the grooves so rare
And the rhymes that we're doing are doo doo

B-boys makin' with the freak freak
*shit... If this is gonna be that kinda party I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes*
    sample: comedy routine performed by Mantan Moreland
B-boys makin' with the freak freak

Been makin' with the freak freak, so unique
I've been learning from the elders now it's time to speak
Oh that shit sounds nice
Mike D come on and get it on y'all
Talking shit about a mile a minute
Put the wax on the table and let the DJ spin it
Well excuse me motherfuckers, can I beg your pardon
I'm gonna see the Knicks at Gadison Square Garden
    The New York Knickerbockers professional basketball team play at home in Madison Square Garden.
And like the Knicks I got game like I worked at Hasbro
    Hasbro is a maker of board games.
On the mic I bug, like I was Prince Jazzbo
    Prince Jazzbo is a reggae producer and musician.
The rhymes are stupid to make you go cuckcoo
You can't sleep 'cause you're Cindy Lou Who
    Cindy Lou Who was the Dr Seuss character in How The Grinch Stole Christmas who couldn't sleep and as  result caught the Grinch stealing the Christmas decorations and presents from her house.
Down with the Hurra since the Raising Hell tour
    Hurra refers to DJ Hurricane, the long time Beastie Boys DJ.  Original DJ Doctor Dre left to host Yo! MTV Raps with Ed Lover during Run DMC's Raising Hell tour,  which the Beastie Boys played opening spots for on the European leg of the tour.
Just listen to his cuts there's no reason to tell more
Cindy what? I didn't catch the last one
That shit sounded kinda nice, but bust a fast one
Well I'm not known for my speed raps
So grab the microphone and cut out the claps
Ah yeah, I like that shit is kind of rough
I'll grab the microphone and fuck it up

Well I might seem out there, a little deranged
I've got to cool off, catch me on the driving range
Well I'm the ladies' choice like I was J.J. Evans
    Character from the 1970's television series Good Times who always fancied himself a bit of a ladies' man.
Legalize the weed and I'll say thank heavens
I'm talking P.G.A. Pro Tour 2
    A Sega video game played heavily during the recording of  the album.
I'm Doctor Beepers on the TV, in my golfing shoes
    Dr. Beeper was a character in the 1980 comedy film about golf, Caddyshack.
Pass me an iron and I'll bust a chip shot
Then you throw me off the green because I'm strictly hip-hop
I'll grab the tee, I'll tee off
I'll grab the golf clubs and I'm off, I'm Audi so check me
I've got the timbos on my toes when I'm not on the green
    Timbos are a nickanme for Timberland boots.
I've got the custom made boots with the spikey things
I'm working on my driving 'cause I'm going pro
I've got the funky fly golf gear from head to toe
Yeah, the b-boys makin' with the freak freak
Mario's calling Nonni's about the pesto pizza
And then he's on a mission and he's checking for peacha

B-boys makin' with the freak freak

Bobo On the Corner (Beastie Boys/Bobo/Nishita)

(instrumental)

Root Down (Beastie Boys)
    Primary sample: "Root Down (And Get It)" - Jimmy Smith.

*that's a record*

Yeah

(chorus)
I kick it root down
I put my root down
So how we gonna kick it?
Gonna kick it root down
Yeah how you gonna kick it?
Gonna kick it root down
So how you gonna kick it?
Gonna get kick it root down
Gonna break it on down, gonna kick it root down
 

It's not a put down, I put my foot down
And then I make some love and put my root down
Like Sweetie Pie by the Stone Alliance
    "Sweetie Pie" - Stone Alliance (1978).
Everbody knows I'm known for dropping science
I'm so electric like Dick Hyman
    Moog: The Electric Eclectics of Dick Hyman - Dick Hyman (1969).
I guess you'd expect to catch the crew rhymin'
Never let you down with the stereo sound
So Mike, get on the mic and turn it out
We're talking root down, I put my boot down
And if you want to battle me, you're putting loot down
I said root down, it's time to scoot down
I'ma step up to the mic in my goose down
Straight up representing from the Upper West
Money makin' putting me to the test
Sometimes I feel as though I've been blessed
Because I'm doing what I want so I never rest
Well, I'm not coming out goofy like the fruit of the loom guys
    Fruit of the Loom is a manufacturer of undergarments. "The Fruit of the Loom guys" were given life in a series of TV commericals in the 1980's.  The fruit actually jumped out of people's dressers and hammed it up.
Just strutting like the Meters with the look-ka py py
    "Look-ka Py Py" and "Struttin'" - The Meters (1970).
'Cause downtown brooklyn is where I was born
But when the snow is falling, then I am gone
Now you might think that I'm a fanatic
A phone call from utah and I'm throwing a panic
But we kick it from the root when we kick it on down
Jimmy Smith is my man, I want to give him a pound
    Jimmy Smith is a jazz organist who works primarily with the Hammond.

(chorus)

Ad Rock (huh?) don't stop (woooo!), get on the mic with the tic and the toc
I'll fill you to the fuckin' rim like brim
    From a 1980's television commercial for Brim coffee.  The commercial had people saying "fill it to the rim, with brim".
I'm walking down your block and you say that's him
There goes the guy with the funky sound
The Beastie Boys you know we come to get down
Because I've got the flow where I grab my dick
And say *oh my god* that's the funky shit
So I'm going to pass the mic and cause a panic
The original nasal kid is doing damage
Every morning I took the train to the High Street Station
    High Street Station is a train station on the 8th Ave. subway line in NYC.
Doing homework on the train, what a fucked up situation
On the way back up hearing battle tapes
Through the underground, underneath the sky scrapes
Like Harlem World Battles on the Zulu Beat Show
It's Kool Moe Dee vs. Busy Bee there's one you should know
    Kool Moe Dee and Busy Bee are two old-school, east coast rappers.  Their Harlem World Battle is one of the more legendary recordings from the afore mentioned radio program.
Enough of that, I just want to give some respect due
MCA Grab the mic and the ma bell will connect you
    Ma Bell was a long-time nickname for the Bell Telephone Company.
Bob Marley was a prophet for the freedom fight
If dancin's praise to the lord then I shall feel alright
    "One Love/People Get Ready" - Bob Marley (1965, co-penned with Curtis Mayfield) contained the phrase "give thanks and praise to the Lord and I will feel all right."
It feels good to play a little music
Tears running down my face 'cause I love to do it
And no one can stop this flow from flowing on
A flow master of disaster with a sound that's gone
I'll give a little shout out to my dad and mom
For bringing me into this world and so on

(chorus)

That's a record 'cause of Mario
    Mario Caldato, Jr. produced this album.

Sabotage (Beastie Boys)

I can't stand it I know you planned it
I'ma set it straight, this Watergate
    Watergate was the White House scandal that lead to the resignation of President Richard Nixon in 1974.
I can't stand rocking when I'm in here
'Cause your crystal ball ain't so crystal clear
So while you sit back and wonder why
I got this fucking thorn in my side
Oh my god, it's a mirage
I'm tellin' y'all it's a sabotage

So so so
So listen up 'cause you can't say nothin'
You'll shut me dow with a push of your button?
But yo, I'm out and I'm gone
I tell you now I keep it on and on

'Cause what you see you might not get
And we can bet so don't you get souped yet
You're scheming on a thing that's a mirage
I'm trying to tell you now it's sabotage

Whoa!

Listen all of y'all it's a sabotage

I can't stand it, I know you planned it
I'ma set it straight this watergate
I can't stand rockin' when I'm in this place
Because I feel disgrace because you're all in my face
Well make no mistakes and switch up my channel
I'm buddy rich when I fly off the handle
    Besides being known as one of the world's greatest drummer, Buddy Rich was also known for having a bit of a temper.
What could it be, it's a mirgle
You're scheming on a thing; that's sabotage

Get It Together (Beastie Boys/J Davis)
    Known sample: "Headless Heroes" by Eugene McDaniels

1-2 1-2 keep it on
    One site visitor pointed out that 1-212 is how you would begin to dial the New York area code.  Her name is Meira and she went on to elaborate a very detailed idea for the origination of Ma Bell.  It's largely unsubstantiated rumor, but of enough interest that if you'd like to read it, you can do so here.
Listen to the shit because we kick it until dawn
Listen to the abstract got it going on
Listen to the ladies come on and let me spawn
All your eggs then you you go up the river
Listen to the abstract that freaky nigger
Now I'm Ad Rock and I shock and I tick and I tock
And I can't stop with the body rock
See I've got heart like John Starks, hitting mad sparks
    Shooting guard for the New York Knicks at the time of this recording.
Pass me the mic and I'll be rocking the whole park
I'm the M to the C to the A and it's a must
The rhymes that we bust on the topic of lust
And my moms is not butt, but fuck it
Let me get down to the rhythm
Yes I get funky and I'm shooting all my jism
Like John Holmes, the X-rated nigger
    The undisputed king of porn, John Holmes' career spanned 2 decades, making 2,274 porno films before his death in 1988.
Listen to the shit 'cause I'm the ill figure
Nobody's getting any bigger than this

*get it together*
Phone is ringing', oh my god
*get it together*
*see what's happenin'*

Ad Rock down with the Ione
    Actress Ione Skye, at the time, Ad Rock's wife.
Listen to the shit because both of them is boney
Got to do it like this like chachi and joanie
    From the television series Happy Days, the Fonz's (Henry Winkler) cousin Chachi (Scott Baio) and the Cunningham daughter Joanie (Erin Moran) became such a popular couple that they had a short lived spin-off series of their own called Joanine Loves Chachi.
'Cause she's the cheese and I'm the macaroni
So why all the fight and why all the fuss
'Cause *i ain't got no dust*
Yea, you know I'm getting silly
I've got a grandma Hazel and a grandma Tilly
Grand Royal prez and I'm also a member
    Mike D was the founder and first CEO of the Grand Royal record label.  This line echoes a Hair Club For Men television commercial where the speaker would say "I'm not just the president of the Hair Club For Men, I'm also a member".
Born on the cusp in the month of november
    In astrology, the cusp is a brief period of time between two astrological signs, usually the 19th-24th of each month.  People "born on the cusp" have a mixture of qualities from both signs on either side of the cusp. Mike D's birthday is November 20th (Scorpio), which places him on the cusp of Sagitarrius and Scorpio.
I do the Patty Duke and in case you don't remember
    Patty Duke, child star of The Patty Duke Show and countless other television shows during the 20th century.  The Patty Duke, as you may recall, is a dance step of Mike D's.
Well, I freak a funky beat like the shit was in a blender
Well, I'm long gone word is born
Don't need a mother fucking fool telling me right from wrong
I don't think I'm slick nor do I play like I'm hard
But I'ma drive the lane like I was Evan Bernard
    A preferred director within the Grand Royal family, having directed videos for Cibo Matto, Butter 08, and the Beastie Boys.
And I'm working on my game 'cause life is taxing
Got to get it together and see what's happening

*get it together*
Wait a minute
*see what's happening*

I go one two like my name was Biz Mark
    Biz Markie.
But I had to do the shit just let me embark
On the lyric and the noun and the verb
Let me kick the shit off 'cause, yo, I'm not the herb
Well, it's not the herb but the spice with the flavor to spare
The Moog with the funk for your derriere
While we're on that topic, yes I like to mention
When it comes to boning, woooo, I'm representing
Spacing, zoning, talkin' on the phone and
My brain is roaming and I don't know where it's going
Talking lots of shit a little tweaking on the weekend
I've got to get him by the reigns because I know that I'm freaking
Well, I'm a funky skull and I'm a Scorpio
    Born on October 31st, Ad Rock would be a Scorpio.
And when I got my flow I'm Doctor on the Go
    Doctor on the Go was a short lived British sitcom in the 1970's.
So Q-Tip, what you on the mic for
    In case you don't know, Q-Tip (aka Jonathan Davis) is the guest rapper on this track.  He was for a long time associated with the group A Tribe Called Quest until their breakup in 1998.
Because I had to talk about the times when I rhyme
And when MC's come in my face, I'm like mace
Because I back them off with the quills
'Cause I have to tell you, nigger 'cause I'll keep you under prills
Resting on Nine One One Sixteenth Ave off the Farmers Boulevard
    This one puzzled me for a long time until I realized that the album lyric sheet is misprinted.  It is Farmers Blvd which is a street which runs through the Jamaica and Hollis neighborhoods, home to LL Cool J, Run-DMC and the fellows from A Tribe Called Quest.  Farmers Blvd crosses Linden Blvd, which A Tribe Called Quest has been known to reference in their own music.  A couple of blocks north of Linden, along Farmers, is 116th Ave.  The "nine" is the part that I haven't figured out yet, since all the street addresses I can find for 116th Ave. are 5 digits.  My thinking at the moment is that the word "on" before "nine" is also a "one", it kinda sounds like it but is hard to tell.  That would make it 19116 116th Ave. which is a real address for a business currently (2003) at that location called Booker Trade Corp. according to the Queensboro Yellow Pages, and it is located only about a block from Farmer's Blvd.
I'm from Manhattan MCA's from Brooklyn
Yeah, MCA, Your shit it be cooking
Praying mantis on the court and I can't be beat
But, yo Tip, what's up with the boots on your feet
I've got the timbos on the toes and this is how it goes
    Timbos, a nickname for Timberland boots.
Oh one two, oh my god
One two, oh my god, I've got some shit
I've got the kung fu grip behind my green trap kit
    Kung fu grip was the name given to the gripping action of children's action figure toys.
Never ever ever smoking crack
Never ever ever fucking wack
I eat the fuckin' pineapple Now & Laters
    Now & Laters are a tangy, bite-size taffy candy.
Listen to me now, don't listen to me later
Fuck it 'cause I know I didn't make it fuckin' rhyme for real
But, yo, technically I'm as hard as steel
Gonna get it together, watch it, gonna get it together ma bell
I'm like ma bell, I've got the ill communications
    See other ma bell references.

Keep it on and on and on

Sabrosa (Beastie Boys/Bobo/Nishita)

(instrumental)

The Update (Beastie Boys/Caldato/Nishita)

*children of the earth!*
    sample: "Children of the Earth Flames" - John Klemmer

Well I can hear the trumpets blowing screaming out the end of time
Look around and listen and you'll see every sign
The waters are polluted as the forests are cut down
Bombing and drilling deep below the ground
Check the prophecies from around the world
And look around now as it all unfurls
Look into yourself and see what goes on
Get a feeling in your heart of the right from the wrong
Because the mother earth needs to be respected
Been far too long that she's been neglected
Race against race, such a foolish waste
It's like cutting off your nose to spite your face
And at the end of the wars, what was the cost
It's clear that the earth was the one who lost
We are one with her as she is one with us
It's unreal how she is treated so unjust
As our planet grows smaller each and every day
Everyone affecting everyone in every way
We're all citizens of the world community
All here together and we're searching for unity
Over the years, I've grown and changed so much
Things I know now years ago, I couldn't touch
There are things I've done that I wouldn't do again
But I'm glad that I did 'cause I've learned from them
I just try to stay present right here, right now
No worries, no fears and without any doubts

It's about time

'Cause in these times, these changing times
A transition is occuring and I am not blind
As the pendlum swings a new age we enter
And with every swing, it draws closer to the center
Yes the storm before the calm and the wars that lead to love
Things must run their course so we push and we shove
But we're here to work it out in one way or another
To find a mutual respect for ourselves and one another
But the true key is a trust in self
For when I trust myself, I fear no one else
I took control of my life, just as anyone can
I want everyone to see it's in the palm of your hand
The past is gone, the future yet unborn
But right here and now is where it all goes on
I know we can fix it and it's not too late
I give respect to King and his nonviolent ways
     Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968) was the leading advocate of peaceful, nonviolent demonstration during the American Civil Rights movement of the 1960's, before his assassination in 1968.
I dream and I hope and I won't forget
Someday I'm going to visit on a free tibet
Someday I'm going to see us all joined as one
And it would be too bad to blow it up before we're done
'Cause we long behind the rage learning from the pain
The love behind the tension like the sun behind the rain
I'm sending loving light to all that is
To all creation and the life we live
I'm not preaching bull shit, just speaking my mind
'Cause I'm here now and it's about time
 

Futterman's Rule (Beastie Boys/Nishita)
 

"When two are served, you may begin to eat"

                  - Gene Futterman

Alright Hear This (Beastie Boys)

*Alright he's scratching it right now, cutting the record back and forth against the needle: back and forth, back and forth, making it scratch.  But let me tell you something, don't try it at home with your Dad's stereo, only under hiphop supervision, alright.*

(chorus)
*Alright here this cuttin'*
*Are ya here to see the MC's, huh?*

Because I grab a microphone and I pick it up
And then I fuck it up and then I turn it in
And then I turn it out, got the body rockin' sound
And then you know I'm gonna *get down*
Eat a scooby snack and take a disco nap
    Scooby Snacks were the doggie treat favored by Scooby Doo and Shaggy, too in the Hanna-Barberra cartoon Scooby Doo.
Because I'm shopping at sears, 'cause I don't buy at the gap
    The Sears chain of department stores and the Gap chain of fashion stores.
Sending this one out to all the funky inspirations
Pretty Purdie on the drums with the beat relations
    Bernard "Pretty" Purdie is often hailed as "the world's most recorded drummer" whose work in soul, funk, jazz, and rock as a session drummer is unmatched.
Well, I'm working on rhymes, they're coming line by line
Trying to put what I feel into word and rhymes
I've got a feeling coming on, I've got to make some shit
A little something stupid, for the twisted and sick
Because I drive like a maniac on the streets
And I don't give a fuck 'cause I've got the beats
Got my nuts swingin' from left to right and
Right to left and I'm death defying

(chorus)

I spin my fortune on a wheel like sajak
    Pat Sajak is the long-time host of the television game show Wheel Of Fortune.
Here's the payback keep going strong like since the way back
I try to be myself but I lose track
'Cause the shit gets complicated now i've got to get back
As we learn to breed love for one another
In these times of melding cultures
I give respect for what's been borrowed and lent
I know this music comes down from african descent
Because I don't need a magic potion
Let me talk about back field in motion
My girls got cheeks for weeks and I'm happy
You know I'm a sneak like my old grand pappy
I gotta give thanks to my man archie shepp
    Archie Shepp was an outspoken, enraged playwright and tenor sax player of the 1960's.
For staying true to inspiration because I don't half step
So I kick out the jams and tell you who I am
    "Kick Out the Jams" - MC5 (1969).
And I talk to the people like Les McCann
    "Talk To the People" - Les McCann (1972) from my hometown of Lexington, KY.

(chorus)

I ask god for a rhyme or two
A little something for the wise as well as the fool
A little something to affect a little taste of change
For the together and the strong as well as the dearanged
I'll do you right like bobby knight
    Bobby Knight, long time, controversial basketball coach at Indiana University, now coaching at Texas Tech..
And then I'm rapping on the mic to the broadway light
Stomp my hands, I clap my feet
And I'm bugging off just like Yusef Lateef
    Yusef Lateef is an accomplished tenor sax soloist prominent in the 1950's and 1960's.
I got a match to my ass and I'ma keep it lit
I need to get some cash, call my accountant britt
I'm rushing around town taking care of my functions
Always got one more thing so forget about function
We create this world and the problems go on
Create our lives and the things that go wrong
So to the deaf, the blind, look around and listen
To what it is you want and for what you're wishing
*oh*

(chorus)

Eugene's Lament (Beastie Boys/Bobo/Gore/Nishita)

(instrumental)

Flute Loop (Beastie Boys/caldato)
    Primary sample: "Flute Thing" - Al Kooper

*Move me*
*like that y'all, pop some old shit*

So so
So, just sit back and max and relax
Off the tracks that I kick, come on and give it up
'Cause I get funky like diaper rash
And you know I'm mad spunky and I'm making cash
I've got sex rhymes like Victoria's got secrets
    Infamous lingerie company, Victoria's Secret.
To all you porno peepers who are trying to peep this
I'm like Al Goldstein, I'm all about screwing
    Al Goldstein publishes the adult magazine Screw.
Lead my team to sixty wins like my man pat ewing
    Pat Ewing was the star center of the New York Knicks professional basketball team at the time of this recording.
Like getting shot out the barrel of a wave
Like virgin pow on the peaks of AK
    On a tip from site visitor Hans, "virgin pow" is a snowboarder term for virgin powder.  One assumes the peaks of AK refers to mountainsin Alaska.
Yo, like a sound that flows to the depths of the soul
Well that's the feeling that I make my goal

*you should*
*rock*
*in Asia*

Uh, uh, uh check it out

A little wine with my dinner so I'm a grape ape
    Great Grape Ape was a Hanna-Barberra cartoon character of the 1970's.
I feel like a winner when I make a mix tape
Because I get ill when I'm on the pause button
And I get my fill and you can't say nothing
More soul on this train then Don Cornelius
    Don Cornelius is the creator and executive producer of Soul Train, and was it's host for many years.  It is the longest running "first-run syndication" program in the history of television, first airing in 1970.
Got the mad subwoofer pumping bass for your anus
Just getting on the mic at the monthly function
Wires hitting switches connecting at the junction
Perlman's got beats and it ain't no secret
    On the next Beastie Boys album Hello Nasty, Robert Perlman is credited on the album with drum programming.
Dante found his shit but you know he freaked it
And so the story goes on and on
Down in SD50 'till the early morning
    Dante Ross is a long time producer in the hip-hip industry (Brand Nubian, De La Soul, Heavy D) who with partner John Gamble comprise a production team known as the Stimulated Dummies (aka the SD50's).

*you should*
*rock*
*in Asia*

Do It (Beastie Boys/Hall/Nishita/Caldato)

(chorus)
Do it, oh let's do it
Oh let's do it with the disco flute, do it

Well like the Blackbyrds I'ma do it fluid
    "Do It, Fluid" - The Blackbyrds (1974).
I'm building rhymes like buildings, like a stonehenge druid
    The famous Stonehenge in Engand was built by a loose band of people called druids.
Step up and get enlightened, educating my mind
I play the tape forward, it's not time to rewind
Step inside the mother fucker and I get my flow on

Season's change when it comes their time
Falls brings the winter and on back to springtime
Well, it's the King Adrock and that's who I am
Listen all of y'all I'm not the son of sam
    David Berkowitz was a New York area serial killer first dubbed the ".44 Caliber Killer".  In the first letter he sent to police, he referred to himself as the "Son of Sam".  He killed six people and wounded seven others before his capture in 1977.  On Paul's Boutique in the song "Looking Down the Barrel of a Gun" Adrock proclaimed "predetermined destiny is who I am/I got my finger on the trigger like the Son of Sam".
'Cause I'm thin and I don't grin
But check it out people 'cause I love to go and swim
Caught up on the phone fiber optic distraction
    In the mid-1990's the telephone companies all got into heated advertising wars boasting their technological advancments, one of which was the introduction of fiber optics in the transmission of signals.
Information super highway got the brain contraction
    Information super highway.  You're on it, baby.
I'm the Kung Fu Master vs. The Sumo Wrestler
Got the beats in Manhattan you can hear in Westchester
    Westchester County, New York is home to communities like Scarsdale, Yonkers, and Pelham.
Well, my mother was born out in coney island
    Coney Island is the famed amusement-park area of Brooklyn, New York.
Raised on the L.E.S. Manhattan island
    L.E.S. is a common abbreviation for Manhattan's lower east side.
My dad came out from Detroit and they had me
    Detroit, Michigan
And on back through Ellis Island goes through the family tree
    Ellis Island, New York was the home of the immigration station from 1892 to 1954.  40% of the American population can trace their heritage through this immigration station.
Well, I'm a six point seven on the Richter scale
    The Richter magnitude scale was developed by Charles F. Richter in 1935 to measure the intensity of earthquakes by utilizing logarithms of wave amplitude as recorded by seismographs.
I've got rhymes gallot and then I never fail
Like gravy on potatos, Luke to Darth Vader
    From the original Star Wars trilogy of films, Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader
I'm a souped up sucker and I'll see you all later

Oh do it, oh let's do it

You see me coming down the block with the funky cuts
You say yo, Mike D and I say mic these nuts
I've got attractions like I'm Elvis Costello
    The British new wave band, Elvis Costello and the Attractions.
Adam Yauch grab the mic 'cause you know you're my mellow
Well when I get it into the zone
I'm gonna take it to a place where my horn can blow
Well I got my shit and the rhyme style's kicking
My brain is flowing honest like Abe Lincoln
    Abraham Lincoln, president of the United States from 1861-1865, earned the nickname "honest" Abe Lincoln.
'Cause I'm the fuckin' rythm ace with the rhyme selection
Listen all of y'all I rap with perfection
Because I got the mother fuckin' old school flavor
That you savor so watch your behavior
Talking other dimensions, levels higher
Why did billy joel say we didn't start the fire
    "We Didn't Start the Fire" - Billy Joel (1989).
Take you to another realm, another level
I've got the funky rhymes but I'm not the funky devil
I step from minute to minute, lifetime to lifetime
Step from stage to stage to see it all unwind
Slowly but surely I seek to find my mind
And every wall that I face is of my own design
Glendale boulevard boulevard
Glendale boulevard is where I'm at
    Glendale Boulevard in Hollywood, California.
It's where I'm at, where I live
Check it, check it out because my head is like a sieve
    "Earache My Eye" - Cheech and Chong (1974).  Original lyric:
        "My teacer's talking to me and she tells me how to live
         But I don't listen to her 'cause my head is like a sieve."
And yo, we turn it out

(chorus)

*Aw-iiight*
*We got the funk*

Ricky's Theme (Beastie Boys/Bobo/Nishita)

(instrumental)

Heart Attack Man (Beastie Boys/Smith)

This is a little diddly.. about a big guy I know named the Heart Attack Man.  And you know, he weighs in pretty hefty.... my man's like 2-ply hefty.... he's like the guy in the Hefty bag commercial

*ok, ok let's take it from here*

Drink a six pack and then you play some ball
Walking down the stairs and then he starts to fall
Add on two joints and then he starts to sweat
Two hundred seventy five pounds that you can't forget

Heart attack, heart attack man
Spend all your money on your health insurance plan
Heart attack, heart attack man
Keep on getting bigger because you know that you can

Why do you force yourself on top of that girl
Laugh with all your buddies because it's a man's man's world
Someday that shit will come back to you
You've been throwing your weight around and your shit is through

Heart attack, heart attack man
Going nowhere, got no master plan
Heart attack, heart attack man

Weighs in at two seventy five
*so take that and move back catch a heart attack*
My man is lucky to be alive
*so take that and move back catch a heart attack*
Smokin' and drinkin' too
*so take that and move back catch a heart attack*
My man, the heart attack man is gonna be running over you
*so take that and move back catch a heart attack*
Got no god damn respect
*so take that and move back catch a heart attack*
Had to put the big big bitch in check
*so take that and move back catch a heart attack*
    sample: "Sucker MC's" - Run DMC.  Much appreciation goes to site-visitor Hilkiahu Zonder for catching this one.

Heart attack, heart attack man
Lungs full of tar and a stomach full of spam
Heart attack, heart attack man
Time to change your ways heart attack man

*ahhhh what do we know about partying or anything else?*
 

The Scoop (Beastie Boys/Caldato)

I don't get blind, I don't drink wine
But I took a sledge hammer and I broke my nine
Because is mine, word is born I rhyme
And every day I write the book down line by line
I'm feeling good when I do it like this
So come on and turn it up because you can't resist
Because I'm back with another track which you lack
'Cause things is wack and that's a fact
Because I'm on time, you're shouting rewind
You know it's Ad Rock that's blowing your mind
My shit is rough and you know it is *so damn tough*
I'm getting intense, not talking nonsese
I made up my mind, not sitting on the fence
I don't always know the right from the wrong
I do my best to figure it out and work it out in the long
I try to do a lot more than I can chew
I balance out my ambitions it's what I've got to do

*Check it*
*Better believe it y'all*
*tick tock... work out*
*Better believe it y'all*
*This is rough and tough*

Because you hide in broad day light, a parasite
A hypocrite, you take a peek quick
You turn your nose up, you think you're high up
You play it real safe and now your shit's fake
I seen you hawking and then you clock my style
And then you try to play it off like you think you're wild
D.I.Y. That means do it yourself
Don't sit around waiting for someone's help
I don't sit back and say good enough
Keep on striving, reinventing but keeping it off the cuff
So kick the level up cuhootnified
Mackadocius vibes positively fortified
I'm throwing rhymes down kicking them downtown
Traveling high speed through the underground
I kick it free style, make it worth your while
I've got shelves of rhymes that I keep on file
I'm feeling good now back home again
New york city is the city that I feel at home in
    Adam Yauch moved back to New York City in 1996.
A blast off from Grasshoff awhile it's been
    An older couple named Grasshoff owned the property where the Beastie Boys relocated to after moving to California.
Stepping into the future again
I'm straight from the 88 to 93 to 94, I'm out the door
Step into the party with the Fila fresh gear
    Fila sneaker company.
People looking at me like I was David Koresh here
    David Koresh became leader of the Branch Davidian faith in 1990.  The Branch Davidian compound in Waco, Texas was burned and Koresh killed after the FBI and ATF stormed the premises after a 2 month standoff.
Kicking rhymes from the heart 'cause that's where I'm at
Fuck the bullshit, be it far from me to pop that
In the search for truth, I go a lot of ways
There's not a lot of peace, that I find these days
I try to stay cool, I try to stay calm
But my life is getting hectic like a smoke bomb
So I'll say it like the group huggy bear
    Mid-1990's riot-grrrl group Huggy Bear.  I'm not sure of the specific reference.
There's a boy-grrrl revolution of wich you should be aware
You can't dis me, it ain't worth it, b
You put yourself down and you don't even see
'Cause I don't play that, I know who I am
For a minute, I did but now I'm back again
I'm feeling strong see, trust myself g
Well I stopped smoking cheeba
And that was part of the key
We've got fire, we need water
There ain't no water so I guess I oughta
Leave you broke in a comatose state of mind
And I'm blind and I'm working overtime so *check it*
I keep my rhymes in a little black book
And I know you want to take another look

*tick tock... wokrout*
*This is rough and tough*

Shambala (Beastie Boys/Bobo/Nishita)

(instrumental)

Bodhisattva Vow (Beastie Boys/Caldato)

As I develop the awakening mind I praise the buddha as they shine
I bow before you as I travel my path to join your ranks,
I make my full time task
For the sake of all beings I seek
The enlighted mind that I know I'll reap
Respect to shantideva and all the others
Who brought down the darma for sisters and brothers
I give thanks for this world as a place to learn
And for this human body that I'm glad to have earned
And my deepest thanks to all sentient beings
For without them there would be no place to learn what I'm seeing
There's nothing here that's not been said before
But I put it down now so I'll be sure
To solidify my own views and I'll be glad if it helps
Anyone else out too

If others disrespect me or give me flack
I'll stop and think before I react
Knowing that they're going through insecure stages
I'll take the opportunity to exercise patience
I'll see it as a chance to help the other person
Nip it in the bud before it can worsen
A change for me to be strong and sure
As I think on the buddhas who have come before
As I praise and respect the good they've done
Knowing only love can conquer in every situation
We need other people in order to create
The circumstances for the learning that we're here to generate
Situations that bring up our deepest fears
So we can work to release them until they're cleared
Therefore, it only makes sense
To thank our enemies despite their intent

The bodhisattva path is one of power and strength
A strength from within to go the length
Seeing others are as important as myself
I strive for a happiness of mental wealth
With the interconnectedness that we share as one
Every action that we take affects everyone
So in deciding for what a situation calls
There is a path for the good for all
I try to make my every action for that highest good
With the altruistic wish to achive buddhahood
So I pledge here before everyone who's listening
To try to make my every action for the good of all beings
For the rest of my lifetimes and even beyond
I vow to do my best to do no harm
And in times of doubt I can think on the dharma
And the enlightened ones who've graduated samsara

Transitions (Beastie Boys/Nishita)

(instrumental)